Sylvia's Journal

Last night I went to bed at 8 PM ‘in pieces.’ The VNA nurse had already told me that my body is still in shock and I think last night it went ‘out of shock’ for a moment. Every cell, bone and muscle hurt and I preferred to get back to the ‘in shock’ state. I think I said something like ‘I feel like I have been in a wreck.’ Thanks to chemicals for better living I fell into a long dopey sleep. It stopped the pain and the tears.

I feel better now. They aches continue of course but they are manageable even though I am at the end of my dopey night.

Yesterday I finished my first book since the accident (Stormy Weather by Carl Hiaasen) that Ann Buxbaum brought me early last week. I remember seeing the size of the book and thinking I could never finish a book like that. But I did and it was just the right book. In the meantime Sita’s friend Jenny who is an editor sent me a stack of her books and I am enjoying the anticipation of my next good read.

As you have already seen in earlier writings, small things have become huge accomplishments, paying bills, renewing the car registration online, transferring car insurance from us (not going to be driving for some time) to our daughters and sons-in law, etc. all these are reasons for celebration (who’d have thunk).

I am pecking away at the food that is still flooding in and am now helped by a few hungry young folks who are working hard on my comfort and deserve good meals. I am thrilled that Birgit’s recipe for Gazpacho from Beirut that appeared in the guest book has been transformed into real gazpacho by Diane and was dropped off yesterday afternoon.

I also had my first experience of Jewish comfort food: Kugel and Matzoh ball soup (AS Ann Lassman wrote us ‘better than WASP comfort food like fluffernutter.’) I totally agree, it was just what the doctor prescribed. We are trying to get some to Axel.

I talked many time to Axel yesterday and he had a good day except at the end when the physical therapist tried to stand him up. That was painful and discouraging and a clear indication of the next challenge for him. These talks buoy me but also make me miss him terribly.

Thanks to all of you who visited Axel and who got a peek at the reality of his current condition. It will help see the progress later on.

Joe Sterling arrived in the middle of the night from San Diego, which means we have a new caretaker on our team. As always, Sita and Tessa and their wonderful men are making up a thousandfold for the trials and tribulations of their teenage years. Pay back accomplished, enough already! I am so totally awed by them.

A request to my Dutch readers:
ik drink liters zoethout thee (koud) per dag en krijg zo genoeg water naar binnen, maar de zoethout thee zakjes zijn bijna op. Kan iemand ons wat (AH) zoethout thee opsturen? het is hier niet makkelijk te krijgen.
En de Texelse schapen voeten creme die ik indertijd met Sietske op de geitenboerderij in het Amsterdamse Bos kocht wordt dagelijks gebruikt voor Axel’s voeten en is nu ook bijna op. Voordat Tessa zoekt naar iets soortgelijks hier, laat even horen of iemand dit kan opsturen.

Onwards, forward, where else?
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