Sylvia's Journal

I woke up to a moonlit winter-wonder-landscape – it is what makes winters in New England worthwhile – before my alarm went off. Axel considers this the middle of the night but for me it is time to get up. Ever since we switched places in bed – Axel’s bad arm is now on the outside – I have enjoyed waking up in my ‘aisle’ seat next to the window. On such a morning it is especially nice. It is still very cold but I could imagine that I am in Africa in an air conditioned room. We had African food leftovers last night after all.

Yesterday I had my annual physical and for once we did not focus on the body parts that were injured in the crash. At least that is what I thought until the nurse practitioner found a pea size lump (.5 mm) in my right breast (at 1 o’clock). Now I need a mammogram and ultrasound to check this out. I was surprised about my own calmness about this new health glitch. Axel seemed a bit more concerned. I can’t help but think that it has something to do with where that breast was during the crash – flattened by the seatbelt. The right side of my body was completely purple for several weeks and my breast and the inside of my upper arm were the color of a ripe dark plum, or the tulip that is called Queen of the night – just one shade over to blue from black. I remember Dr. Kim telling me that the color would eventually go away but the lumpiness might remain. Let’s hope that that is what this is all about.

Although Monday was a day off for everyone to honor Dr. Martin Luther King, I took advantage of it to get several things off my to do list, which included a proposal for a conference in Ghana about leadership and management in Sub Sahara Africa. How could I not send in a proposal given what we just did there? My new GIMPA colleague Brian responded enthusiastically to the idea and we submitted it with everyone’s name on it. I also completed most of my reports so that I can focus on what lies ahead today.

Axel had his first EMDR session with Ruth, using the clickers. Like I, he was amazed about the speed with which stuff comes up. This first session he had to think about his safe place, as I had to do back in August. For me it was the big recliner chair in the middle of the room. For him it is being in a small rowboat in the middle of Lobster Cove, reading. So now Ruth sees us both. I think this therapy is going to be good for us as individuals and as a couple. We talked about all this while we were eating the first two of the 5 haring I brought back

We are picking up our walking habit now that walking is getting easier and easier. On Sunday I went for a 45 minute walk while Axel was watching the Patriot’s game and even included a very slow jog of 10 minutes. I am determined to go for a walk everyday if the weather cooperates. It did yesterday, a very cold but blue-sky-crystal-clear winter’s day. And so we walked to town together, chatted with some people along the way and then we walked back.

We heated up Fatou’s leftover turkey and couscous for dinner and ate it while sitting by the fire and watching Sherlock Holmes.

Tim Bowers call up in the early evening. He is the person who held my hand and kept me awake after the plane crashed and before the rescue team came. He had asked me the names of Axel and Joan and kept calling them by their name to make sure no one drifted off into unconsciousness. He and Chris Soucy, his friend who we met when we went to Gardner and who covered Axel’s head wound with his shirt, are probably responsible for us being still around. It was an emotional conversation and we promised to go out and see him and his fiancee Rhonda sometime soon. We had missed Tim when we were in Gardner. He was much traumatized by the crash and from his voice we could tell he still may be.