All day my head and heart have been in Kabul. All the familiar spots were under siege. I was both relieved to not be there and sorry for having abandoned Kabul and my colleagues and friends there, including those in the embassy compound.
Today, Tuesday, was always the day we would go to the embassy for our weekly meeting with our USAID colleagues. It must have been cancelled as everyone must have hunkered down in the safe rooms.
And so I continued to live the free life I so badly wanted while my heart was all but free. Out just in time, I thought, and Axel thought, yet one cannot be totally out within a week of return.
I had planned to write just when the news came through and found myself paralyzed. Now, 10 hours later, with calm having returned to Kabul, I can still not write. The Kabul attacks droned out everything wonderful I did today – the breakfast in Gloucester, the visit from Ruth and Don, the kayaking and filling of the traps with lobster bait, the discovery of another lobster hiding in the seaweed (pre-dinner snack) and a lovely dinner – all obscured by this terrible assault and leaving me with a sense of dread about the future.
Sylvia's Journal 
0 Responses to “Dread”