Sylvia's Journal

If one didn’t know about system dynamics or complexity, this is a good time to explain what these words mean. We are always in flux, and all part of countless dynamic nested systems – nothing stable even though they may have looked that way. Hopefully everyone now does see how everything, and everyone is connected to everything and everyone, except maybe for the people who ‘don’t believe in masks.’  I watched a lovely video (the Egg) that culminates in the realization that we are all part of each other, all the good parts and all the bad parts.

The pandemic system dynamics play out in hugely complex ways from the macro to the micro.  Because of my travel I have always known that if some policy gets enacted in one part of the globe, people we cannot see or hear and are continents away, are impacted. Unless the media put a spotlight on one of those occurrences, we could be blissfully ignorant. No more.

We had hoped to celebrate our granddaughter’s 5^th birthday tomorrow here at Lobster Cove. All the presents are ready, wrapped and all and the decorations impatiently waiting in a drawer.

Since we are all in overlapping pods, we have to make rules about what we can and cannot do and what our various pods are OK and not OK with – there is accountability on all sides. We are learning to redefine risk. In the pandemic the threshold for unacceptable risks is very low for some and high for others. Negotiating these different thresholds is extremely challenging. When there are infractions, there are consequences. This Boston Globe article shows that many of us are struggling with this reality.

As a result of a few ‘above-the-threshold’ encounters in the last few days, Saffi’s party has been canceled. We are both sad and disappointed. At the same time, we are also relieved as it would have been the largest gathering of people (outside, but nevertheless) since the pandemic started.  We were never totally on board with the size of the gathering, but family dynamics about inclusion and exclusion came into play and we left the decision making to Saffi’s parents. For us it was one of those ‘above-the-threshold’ affairs. Now we don’t have to deal with 5 grandparents, 8 aunts and uncles and 6 kids under the age of 8.  We are going to have a quiet weekend and sing happy birthday over Zoom. It won’t be the first time we miss being physically present during a grandchild’s birthday party. 

The disappointment is placed in the basket with the others (our wedding anniversary in Holland, my planned travel, a wedding in Colorado, our annual Easter party, the Memorial Day celebrations and visits to the ancestor graves, etc.).