Sylvia's Journal

The walls of the new house are being painted, the carpets put in and the cook and housekeeper are hired. The quality of the food prepared by the new cook got him hired instantly. The housekeeper came with the most glowing recommendations from a colleague of mine who lived here with his wife under the previous project. The young man is learning English and I am learning Dari – it seemed like a good combination. His name is Ghulam Ali. I asked him how he preferred to be called and he said Ghulam which has a guttural ‘g’ that would give Axel trouble. When I discovered that Ghulam means slave I asked if we could call him Ali.

I received the wonderful news that Axel has made his reservations to arrive on the 4th, the day before we will stop receiving travelers. We expect that after the 4th pick up at the airport may become too problematic because of extra security measures. It’s nice to be in close down mode with him rather than without him. I am counting the days.

Now it becomes even more important to get the house in order. A whole bunch of things are being scratched off the list that will lead us to a more normal existence, if such can ever be the case in this country. Having our own house and people to cook and clean for us is appealing, after somewhat of a nomad existence for the last month.

I had lunch today behind the curtain with the women, two doctors and a secretary. I asked if they travel to the provinces and to my surprise they said yes. This is extraordinary. Not being able to travel is the main reason that is invoked for why we don’t have more professional women on staff. I tried to pry out of them why they can travel and discovered that one has a very enlightened husband, also a doctor, and the other is unmarried, also extraordinary.

Probing a little further I discovered that they have travelled outside Afghanistan and had no problem mixing with the opposite sex when in another country. Why then, I asked, can they not feel comfortable here, eating on the other side of the curtain, alongside the men. They answered that it is not because they feel uncomfortable, but because it is uncomfortable for the men. Of course I had asked the same question on the other side of the curtain and got exactly the opposite answer. I don’t get it; the sexes mix freely during the workday or when they are outside the country, but when it comes to eating suddenly everyone assumes that the other sex would be too uncomfortable. I have never seen whole populations shoot themselves in the foot by not testing this very basic assumption (“they will not be comfortable”).

We are having a changing of occupants at the guesthouse. Big man Greg has left with duffle bags full of carpets that will grace his self-built house in Virginia. Niranjan leaves tomorrow for Delhi and then Dhaka, and Inua from Ghana has just arrived. The result is that, at least for tonight, we are having four occupants in the house representing four continents: India, Africa, North America and Europe.

The international theme was also present in the quarterly MSH staff meeting that I ‘attended’ by cellphone and website. It brings all our staff from opposite sides of the world together in one physical and virtual space. It’s pretty amazing to have over 100 people ‘meet’ this way across continents, cultural and linguistic barriers.

Few of our Afghan colleagues attend these meetings mostly because they don’t have the connections at home and because by the time the early morning meeting starts in the US we have already put in 10 hours of work and it is already 2 hours past the official ending of the workday. It would be the equivalent of asking everyone in Cambridge to hang around the office from 5 to 7 and then be in a virtual meeting until 8:30 PM.

If I had to travel across time in the dark and had a family waiting at home I probably would also decline. But it is too bad they can’t be part of this because it is quite an amazing feeling to be in a meeting like that with colleagues from all over the world.