Archive Page 69

Hotlines

Last night I attended the 40th anniversary of the (volunteer staffed) Counseling & Referral hotline of the Planned Parenthood League of Massachusetts (PPLM). Some 30 years ago I was one of those volunteers and took calls from distraught teenagers or married women who didn’t know what to do about an unintended pregnancy. For the teenagers, if they were over 3 months pregnant, they needed to go to court to get consent when two parents were not able/willing or asked to give this. Imagine that, 2 parents, while many of the callers had no dad at home! That was the law. We had an elaborate network of lawyers who prepared those girls to go to court, stand before the judge and get the consent so they could have an abortion. Our current Democratic candidate for governor of Massachusetts was one of those. It was a labor of love.

We also got calls from young men and women asking whether you could get pregnant the first time, doing it standing up, etc. We defused all sorts of myths and counseled people on what to do or referred them to others. We also would put them on hold and check with our fellow counselors when we didn’t know what to tell them.

Now almost 30 years later, the hotline still gets some 20.000 calls a year, despite the wide availability of the internet to answer questions (although not always correctly). Clearly, the need for sexual, family planning and reproductive health education is there. Some of these might be children of those we counseled way back.

The competition, the so-called Pro-Lifers have now established their own hotline pulling people into an orbit that is full of misleading information.

The celebration and reception given to old and current volunteers was inspiring with wonderfully touching and funny stories about our work. I must admit I had forgotten much about it other than the camaraderie and the excellent training we were given.

This morning I looked for my diaries for that time to see if I had written anything about that experience and discovered a big gap for that period. I did not write anything between 1985 and 1987 – for reasons I will never know.

But that got me reading my lines before that period when Sita was about the same age as Faro is now. What I found is an account of how I came to be what I am now – something I had forgotten. I decided to start typing my entries that started in 1976. It will be an interesting journey.

The other ill

I returned home without a fever, re-assuring my entourage that I had not brought Ebola to Massachusetts. Nevertheless not everyone wanted to hug me or shake my hands so I continued to elbow a bit here and there.

Back in the office I learned that some of my colleagues are in Liberia and doing good work to make sure that sick people who don’t have Ebola, or pregnant women can use the health facilities. I can imagine no one wants to go to a clinic or hospital when these have become depositories of dying Ebola patients. In the panic around Ebola we tend to forget that more people need help for other ailments and more are dying now, probably, of these illnesses because they can’t access that care. I was wondering whether I would have agreed to go there and I am not sure. I am proud of my brave colleagues.

Women power

I don’t think I have ever heard a group of about 40 African men speak freely about their feelings in the company of their bosses and peers. But something got sparked over the last few days and the district teams were truly on fire last night after, they talked about saying ‘thank you’ more often (this is rather counter-cultural), reflecting on their own contributions to tensions and conflicts, turning complaints into requests and coaching their teams.

We completed the program with a lot of ‘feel good’ speeches but also exhortations to now stay the course. I am glad that I went, in spite of warnings from around me to stay in bed and recover fully. I am recovered fully now.

With Malalai getting the Nobel Peace Prize, the observations and contributions from the handful of women in our program and a recent blogpost on MSH’s website  (about a brave Nigerian woman who may have singlehandedly stopped the spread of Ebola in Nigeria, I am once again reminded what singularly important role women play in society and how men, who don’t let them develop or use their talents, are shooting themselves and the rest of us in the foot.

Show time

The entire morning, and part of the afternoon, the teams had a chance to shine in front of the DG. First each was given time to explain a poster they had put together and worked on all day yesterday: their challenge model, their action plan, a graph showing how they had progressed towards or beyond the target they had set back in May.

After the morning break each team was asked to tell us about some of the practices (or lack of practices) before they started this program, and then what they are doing different now. Although each filled in an elaborate chart covering many pages, they were asked to give the highlights, the most important new behaviors they have adopted, and, which presumably, made them successful in reaching or overshooting their targets.

The new behaviors concerned leadership practices (mobilizing others, focusing, understanding root causes, working effectively in teams, inspiring, aligning stakeholders not thought of before); management practices (monitoring not just once a year but monthly, looking at and using data for planning purposes, planning around challenges rather than doing the yearly cut-and-paste ritual) and good governance practices (being more inclusive, empowering women, using resources judiciously, and setting direction through a shared vision and a focus on goals, etc.).

After lunch we were treated to 11 stories about direct or indirect effects of this program on others. The facilitator team is keen on documentation, something that we don’t always pay enough attention to. Interestingly, several of the stories where not about our program but about people who work under or with our participants. They learned from our participants, second hand, and then, when given permission, used the new tools and understandings to make changes they had wanted to make all along. I think I am going to re-define leading as removing constraints that keep people from using their talents and do what they had wanted to do all along to make a difference in the lives of others.

Mystery

Sometimes I don’t understand how things work here. We were invited to a restaurant (‘The Albatros’) by the local delegation in honor of the Director-General of the Ministry of Health who came all the way from Abidjan to hear the teams’ progress so far. His presence is very motivating to the participating teams because they have little contact with people that high up.

One of our facilitators, who is also a director of one of the health districts, showed up at the restaurant, when we were all seated, with lots baskets, pots and pans. They were unwrapped and unpacked on a table and revealed a copious meal with many different dishes and side dishes. How she managed to be with us all day and cook for some 25 people is a mystery – and not just a simple meal: we had rabbit, chicken cooked in various ways, sauces, tomato and onion salads and more.

What is also a mystery is why a restaurant would agree to host a party with all the cooking brought in from outside. Maybe they made all their money on the wine.

We were eating under the watchful eyes of Arnold Schwarzenegger or someone of his ilk on a giant plasma screen. He was doing dangerous things with cars, women and casinos. I have a hard time in restaurants with TV screens and try to seat myself so I can’t see them. But I was seated next to the D-G, in full view of the action movie. No one paid any attention to the flashing and exploding going on on the screen, interspersed with women who were in various states of undress. I had to muster all the discipline I have and keep my gaze focused on other things.

Once people started eating all conversation stopped and everyone concentrated on the food, which was accompanied by water and wine, countless bottles of each. The food was very spicy. I was glad I no longer had a sore throat or coughing fits.

When our plates were empty the Regional Director who is hosting us and the DG said their words of thanks and we were on our way home, back to our hard beds and my thimble of NyQuill.

Lighting a match

We met all day on Tuesday to review where we are in the longer process of leadership development and prepare for the days to come. All of the facilitators were there, the same team I started with now five months ago, minus one, the most senior member of the team who is now advising the president which puts him, hierarchically, in the stratosphere and outside our reach.

The review of what happened since May was inspiring to say the least. The team has made this program their own, always being a few pages ahead of the participants. If they hardly knew what coaching was five months ago, they have been doing it since we had our first long coaching training over skype, me in Ulaanbataar, they in Abidjan, and taken to it with abandon.

Today was an extra day, inserted very wisely by the facilitation team as they realized that the district teams never have the time to reflect on their management and leadership practices, produce the required documentation to show links between leadership and management development and public health results, share their accomplishments and record their progress towards the targets they set back in May. So it was a quiet day for me and Alison. With our internet flash drive keys we were able to catch up on our email and other tasks, without losing any of the exciting stories.

After lunch, we watched the film Inside Story about a Kenyan soccer player, his vision, and the many obstacles on his way, not the least a few unprotected sexual encounters that got him HIV and which he passed on. It’s essentially a film about HIV, made in South Africa, with support from MSH. It illustrated beautifully what we are trying to do here. Of course a film about soccer would always be a hit, anywhere in Africa, but the HIV angle made it also a film about the teams’ work.

After the film the district teams shared with us some of the surprising side effects that this program has produced: increased prenatal visits and deliveries by skilled personnel, brought about not by the participants in our program but by people they told about the training and shared their learning with. All these surprising stories involved midwives and nurses who ran with the tools given to them, mobilized communities and other resources to move to newly minted visions and new freedoms given to them by their superieurs to do what they had wanted to do all along but never felt empowered to do. Something is rubbing off.  I just lit the match back in May.

Elbow greetings

We met at the MSH office yesterday, meeting new and old colleagues. We reviewed our program and then were on our way in northeastern direction to about 30 kilometers from the Ghanaian border. The trip took us nearly 5 hours over increasingly poor roads; at the very end the asphalt was in such poor shape that we drove mostly on the sides, skirting the biggest holes.

It is rainy season and the rain comes on suddenly and hard but doesn’t last long. We were driving a fairly new SUV and were comfortable inside. I managed to do a lot of knitting so that Faro’s cotton hoodie is hopeful done in time before the weather requires wool sweaters.

We met up with the rest of the team at our Abengourou hotel where we will hold the workshop. We are no longer greeting each other with the usual ‘bisous’ (kisses) three or four times, alternating cheeks. Now the greeting is a touching of elbows, where all skin is covered. Short-sleeved people need to put on something to cover the naked skin, something not quite respected by all; it is after all short sleeve weather here. At the entrances to hotles and offices you will now find large pails with soap and water. The simple act of hand washing may finally take root as a regular habit, something that has eluded health professionals for decades and is responsible, partially, for the rapid progression of Ebola across the region.salut-coude

Some miscommunication about dinner landed us in a ‘maquis’ the kind of small local restaurant you find all over this part of West Africa, where you eat outdoors and there is no elaborate menu, just local dishes. Our Ivorian colleagues insisted on us eating fried yams (ignames) as it is the season. This was, surprisingly, not on the menu and required that someone go out and get the yams. As a result we had to wait more than an hour for our meals to arrive – but it was worth the wait.

The mattresses in our hotel are hard like a plank, and so is the pillow – you cannot fold it. I can do my early morning yoga and exercises right on the mattress without making a dent. I was considering this morning to send someone to the market to get me a piece of softer foam but then again, I slept very well for 9 hours thanks to my nightly thimble of NyQuill.

One jihadi less

I had boarded the plane to Paris, a narrow body Delta plan. I was wedged in between two enormous gentlemen at the front of the economy cabin. We had finished boarding when 5 border police entered the plane, trying not to look agitated but I could tell they were excited about something. They walked to the back of the plane, everyone craning their necks. About 5 minutes later returned with a young man with a shaved head wearing a sweatshirt, holding a white plastic bag. I had noticed him on the way in since my seat was right at the boarding door. There was something about that white plastic bag. He didn’t hold it casually, by the handle, but all crunched up. It had caught my eye. Now he was leaving flanked by the uniformed men, handcuffed. Outside the plane several white cars with flashing lights were waiting, I suppose for him.

No one said anything, as if it was a routine matter. People rolled their eyes. We were probably all thinking whether his checked luggage had been taken off the plane as well. It was momentous and banal at the same time. Rumors started circulating right away, ‘he had an Arab passport,’ (as if there is such a thing). My conclusion was that he was either doing drugs or he was one of those recently converted and wannabee jihadis who have been leaking into the Middle East from Europe, Canada and the US.

And then we took off and arrived seven hours later in Paris. I was able to secure all three empty economy seats on the row behind me, given myself and my bulky row mates more breathing space. I took a Nyquill and slept all the way. It was a good start after a bad one.

In Paris I had a few coughing fits and took more medicine before boarding the full flight to Abidjan. This time no empty seats or chance to sleep. Instead I listened to my audio book (Cutting Stone), did jigsaw puzzles and knitted, all the while keeping my facemask firmly in place except at eating time. The five and something hours passed quickly. I hooked up with my colleagues who were sitting at the back of the plane.

At our arrival in Abidjan we passed the temperature test, given a squirt of hand gel and let into the country. I hope they are as fastidious when it is time to depart.

Stormy

It had been raining for several days but nothing would have told me it was a big storm that had passed over us if it wasn’t for the cove. It is a roiling and boiling cauldron with layers of foam on top of the angry sea. The tide was so high that our beach cooking area was overrun and the kayaks from our friends and our Adirondeck chair nearly swept into the ocean.

We have the dogs over for the weekend, a sleepover at oma and opa. They are easy guests, just requiring two meals a day and a place to sleep. For the rest of the time they entertain themselves catching chipmunks and squirrels. They don’t really catch them because these critters are too fast but this keeps the dogs busy and running. Tessa and Steve are interrupting their move into their new home for a wedding in faraway Pennsylvania. They are in that age group now that marries and has babies.

I have been home for a week and a new departure looms, tomorrow. I have been trying to get my health back and only partially succeeded. We now know that it is the cavities of my sinuses that are the culprit for my coughing and low energy. One antibiotic was replaced by another which, hopefully will get at these hard to reach places.  I am going once again with a mask and armed, this time, with various medicines. I will be surrounded by doctors this time but hope I won’t need them.

In the meantime four extraordinary Japanese women, who competed, and won, a fellowship from the Fish Family Foundation as part of the Japanese Women Fellowship Initiative, showed up at MSH and I got to spend a day and a half with them at the beginning of the week. We sat around a table and talked about leading and managing, about women and leading, about financial management and fundraising in American NGOs, conflict management and more. It was such a treat for all of us. I was rewarded with a nice closing ceremony and moving speeches at Simmons College this morning, followed by a French Bistro lunch that will keep me full till tomorrow.

I had not driven into Boston since our office moved out of Cambridge. I had forgotten how bad the traffic  is when you don’t drive in at 5:30 AM. Luckily I am listening to a good book on tape which I can now listen to through the car audio via Bluetooth.

Move

On Sunday Axel took me up to see Tessa’s and Steve’s new home in  New Hampshire, the day before their move in. It is one hour and a half from our house, a nice drive through endless woods where the trees are turning yellow and orange.

The house is an odd assortment of rough-hewn structures that look kludged together from the outside but inside it is nice and cozy with a beautiful large eat-in kitchen, large rooms on several levels and bathrooms at each. The kitchen and living room have a large deck that looks out over their own pond and some of their 7.5 acres of wood. There are outbuildings for animals (chicken, horses, goats)  for wood, for making an office. You’d think you were far away from the city but in fact they are just outside Concord NH and an enormous shopping mall on the way.

Their parting from their sleaze bag landlord was right in style with him threatening the movers with arrest, calling the cops and blocking the moving van. Tessa said that this made it very easy to leave Dorchester and move north.

She is moving to territory where dreadlocks, especially copper colored and knee length dreadlocks turn heads. Some smile, the hippies are back, and some, she told us, you see them wonder.

Axel had worked hard with the painting and getting the place ready, especially for Tessa who has to make a running start as her business takes no pause.  This is a good thing of course. Steve took a week off, also a good thing.

He still has to commute to Boston but hopes to find something closer by as the commute from Concord to Boston, even when not during rush hour, is a punishing one.


March 2026
M T W T F S S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  

Categories

Blog Stats

  • 140,332 hits

Recent Comments

Olya's avatarOlya on Cuts
Olya Duzey's avatarOlya Duzey on The surgeon’s helpers
svriesendorp's avatarsvriesendorp on Safe in my cocoon
Lucy Mize's avatarLucy Mize on Safe in my cocoon
Spoozhmay's avatarSpoozhmay on Transition

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 78 other subscribers